The More Things Change, the More They Stay the Same
Part 2:
"If you need to use any one of my skills. I can do whatever you want."
-Napoleon Dynamite
After a quick stop at Thessalia's, where Neltak, Lordex, Deep Pain, and Forever Mad soon found suitably skimpy outfits in awkward shades of blue, pink, and orange, the group moved on to Falador, where the barber took one look at Deep and fainted.
"“This is quite amazing,†Deep said. "“I kind of like having hair.â€Â
"“Lumby next,†announced Snowangel. "“We need to get you back up to speed. We'll start with rats.â€Â
It took a moment to pry Lordex loose from the Lumbridge Castle doorpost, but soon she and the other girls were killing rats with reckless abandon. Moving on down the road, the cows took the brunt of the next onslaught.
"“You seem to be feeling better now,†Sweetangel said. "“But you look a little clumsy, there, Mad.â€Â
Torri watched critically as Forever Mad slipped in a pool of cow blood and went down. "“Maybe we should skip combat for now and do something easier,†she said.
"“What's easier than killing cows?†Katy asked.
"“How about woodcutting?†Serame said. "“Let's head to Ardougne.â€Â
Bronze axes in hand, the group entered the keep at the Sorcerer's Tower and began to hack away at the magic trees. "“I'll get mine first!†Lordex yelled.
- sorctower.png (491.55 KiB) Viewed 6779 times
At the next tree, a young man by the name of Twuhaa looked over and noticed the group of ladies invading his space. He stopped chopping for a moment, his eyes resting on Deep Pain. "“Hey,†he said. "“That‘s, um, an interesting name for a hot chick like you.â€Â
Moz quickly pulled Katy and Sweetangel back behind a tree to watch. Deep looked at Twuhaa and batted her eyelashes. "“I seem to be having a little trouble with my axe,†she cooed. "“I can't seem to get any of these twinkly logs.â€Â
Twuhaa smiled. Katy howled with laughter and Moz clapped a hand over her mouth. Twuhaa stepped over to Deep's tree and began to chop. "“I haven't seen you here before,†he said. "“Would you like to be my gf?â€Â
Deep smiled sweetly. Snowangel took a step backwards and pulled Serame with her, out of the line of fire.
"“Oh, yes,†Deep said. "“I haven't had a bf in I don't know how long! You look quite, ahh, friendly. I've never seen anyone cut trees in full arma before. I bet you are rich. I would really love to have full arma…You seem very brave, too. Do you go to the wildy much? I know someone who…â€Â
Lordex and Forever Mad dropped their axes and rushed over to Deep. They each grabbed an arm and rushed her out of the enclosure.
"“Come on!†Sassy yelled. "“Go, go, go! Where to, Snow?â€Â
"“Somewhere far away from here!†SnowAngel called back. Neltak crashed into the bushes as she tried to leave the keep. She went down hard, hairpins flying. Snow glanced over her shoulder and saw Neltak tugging her skirt down as she tried to get up. "“Agility, I think,†SnowAngel said. "“How about the wildy course? Hopefully, we‘ll be the only ones there!â€Â
"“I added you!†Twuhaa called after them. "“I'll pm you! Add me, Lovey!â€Â
Thankfully, Deep's response was lost in a blue teleport haze.
Coming soon: Part 3 - "“I could calculate your chance of survival, but you won't like it.â€Â
--Marvin, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy